Friday, April 18, 2008

Chad Jr., Chad 3, Chad 4, Chadina, and Chadeci Don't Want to Leave Cincinatti

Okay, let's get one thing straight. I've been an Ocho Cinco supporter since about 2003. I loved his endzone antics when the Bengals were one of the worst franchises in all of sports. Though we were dwelling in the cellar with the likes of the Kansas City Royals and LA Clippers, we had entertainment, and we were grateful. I always defended Ocho against sharp criticism comparing him to T.O. and pre-Patriot Randy Moss. He wasn't a self-serving convict who cared more about himself than the team. He was our little 85. A wide receiver who talked a big game, entertained the fans, but bottom-line was all about winning. He defended his teammates in the media and cried after losses in the locker room, putting the blame on himself. However, I'm sad to say those days are gone. Gone for one reason...

I can barely look

Ever since golden-boy Carson Palmer tore his (three capitol letters of your choice) ligament the Cincinatti Bengals haven't been the same, especially Chad Johnson. Carson has played two seasons since destroying his knee, an injury most football players are unable to return from, and the Bengals have had two subpar seasons without him, finishing 8-8 both seasons I believe. I'd check that information but I'm at work and writing on a blog is bad enough. Plus the porn I'm watching uses up most of the hard drive on these pieces of shit. Carson has played good football, not Pro-Bowl quality, but still good football. A lot of his interceptions have been due to the injuries on the offensive line over the last two seasons and not being afforded the time the Tom Brady's and Peyton Mannings of the league receive. David Pollack suffered a career ending neck injury. Odell Thurman has been suspended two full years for a methamphetamine addiction. Chris Henry has been arrested 17 consecutive weekends for providing alcohol to middle school aged girls. We have had some problems, but I don't think the franchise is solely to blame for the past two seasons. Football is a game of ebb and flow, a rollercoaster ride if you will. The Packers and Giants surprisingly flowed this year. The Browns played well. The Ravens and Bengals stalled. And the Falcons should have just quit half way through. Football success depends on a variety of exigent circumstances outside of the coach and the three or four star players. The Giants were able to topple the invincible Patriots because of a weak ankle and two freakish defensive ends.

I've started to ramble, so let me bring this back to it's original point. When you read this, Chad, know that the Bengal Nation has not lost it's faith in you completely. I don't like the comments you recently made about Carson having no right to speak for you. He's trying to do so damage control before the season. I know you are emotional and just want to win, but let me tell you that the Bengals can win. There aren't four better quarterbacks in the league than Carson Palmer. There aren't three better 2nd option wide-receivers than Who's Ya Momma. The Bengals can succeed, but we want you to be here when it happens. I know you will probably be on this site in the next hour or so, so please hear my cry. If you are unwilling to listen, that's fine too. To be honest, as I've spent this time writing this, I'm getting more and more tired of your shit.


Blogger Runs With Two Horses said...

Exigent circumstances? That sounds like lawyer double speak to me. I couldn't trust a word you wrote after that. I hope Cincinnati keeps Chad because I have a terrible feeling that my idiot Cowboys would be willing to invite him down to the second chance ranch. If Dallas gets anymore loathsome knuckleheads I think I'll pick a random AFC team to fill the void this season (which will be hard, because I know that for at least one season, Chad, Pacman, and the like would make Dallas a front runner for the Super Bowl...quite a messy situation).

As an aside, Thelonius, this is more fun that just e-mailing back and forth to each other, but I'm not sure anyone else has come back to our site yet. I'm good either way, this time we're here for us. Just like Ricky Bobby when he comes back for that last race and his sponsor is "Me." It always comes back to Ricky Bobby, doesn't it?

April 18, 2008 at 2:29 PM  

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