Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Drew Gooden's Fashion Explosion

With the new year approaching, awesomeUSA can only think about one thing: The June NBA Draft. The NBA draft is one of the most exciting times in sports, because it serves as a launch pad for players onto the national and even international scene. Unfortunately, it has lost some of its glory, with the new age rule imposed to keep high school kids from entering the draft. This requires the Traiblazers to make somewhat decent selections. Absolutely nothing will top the 2005 draft, where teams acted like they had to scoop up all the highschool kids because this would be there last chance. I am still convinced if the Blazers would have had every pick in the draft, not one college player would have been drafted. The Blazers, of course, drafted Martel Webster over Charlie Villanueva, Sean May, Danny Granger, Hakim Warrick, Luther Head, and David Lee.

The other great thing that the NBA draft produces are the ugliest/greatest suits known to man. The draft, as mentioned earlier, is a time for many kids who have limited exposure outside of college basketball and absolutely no fashion sense to have their day in the sun and enjoy themselves. AwesomeUSA loves this more than anything. Here are some of the greatest suits worn in past drafts:

Drew Gooden in his "no button" suit. Gooden said, "It's a lot easier to get on and off without the buttons. I can just pull it over my head, like a t-shirt. Don't worry, I'm gonna wear a whole lot uglier fucking stuff when I'm playing."

Bonzi Wells said, "I wore three suits, each one on top of the other, just in case. Right before I went on stage I took the bottom two off and just wore the biggest one. Oh yeah,I had also smoked a lot of weed."

"MVP? MVP? No I didn't think about winning MVP back then," Steve Nash said, "Honestly I was just hoping to get through the night without getting my ass kicked."

"Do you get it," Jalen Rose asked, "Rose-colored suit ... last name is Rose. Anybody? Eeeks, what are you gonna do?"

"I was honestly just trying to keep a low profile, Samaki Walker said, "So people wouldn't remember me from that night and remember I was getting drafted ahead of Kobe Bryant. I guess the all white with the top hat wasn't the way to go. Ah well, C'est la vie."


Blogger Natty Bumpo said...

Despite what T-Monk's post may suggest, the other contributors at Awesome USA do not condone making fun of the mentally handicapped or the impoverished. Additionally, J-Mac has autism and is not mentally retarded.
Stay classy, Thelonius.

December 12, 2006 at 7:50 PM  
Blogger Jumping Bull said...

Thelonious's Bukkake Explosion - I think I got some in my eye!

December 12, 2006 at 8:33 PM  

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